Attachment Parenting

Some people don't like labels and putting themselves under a certain title because....well I'm not exactly sure why. They don't want a certain stigma that comes with it or maybe they just don't want to feel confined to what the title entails. I don't know but I AM an Attachment Parent. I heard about this stlye of parenting at the end of my pregnancy and it just clicked. It felt so right for me, like the way parenting should be. "The Baby Book" by Dr. William and Martha Sears is what got me through the first few months of my Nonis life. Noni is now 20 months old and I still refer to many of the Sears books for support, suggestions and just reassurance. I loose my confidence every now and then. I haven't had to fully explain attachment parenting to my family yet but I'm thinking with the discipline days soon ahead, if not already here, it will probably come up soon. We aren't neccessarily not going to spank but it will not be our first option. (thats a topic for another post)

So anyways. I love attachment parenting and feel like God knew I needed this style of parenting, with all the support, resources, and now like minded mamas that I have found, inorder to get through this journey. I do believe this is how God would parent if he was a daddy, oh wait he is a daddy. (Haha also another post.)

Check out this article on the API Blog, I really like how she explained AP.

Night Weaning

So I have started the process of night weaning. I never thought I would still be nursing my girl at 20 months. Until I had her that is. When I was pregnant I thought it was just wierd to be nursing a baby past a year. And nursing I child that talks, how rediculous. But once that sweet babe was in my arms and we started our breastfeeding journey, there was no question that I would nurse past the age of one. Why should I stop. We both enjoy it, it comforts her, and it puts her to sleep. (every time) We co-sleep and whenever she woke up she would find the boob and go back to sleep. It was fine with me because that meant I got to sleep.

Then I got pregnant. I think my milk has lessened and it seemed like Noni just wanted to nurse 24/7. She started waking more and more through out the night, wanting to nurse what felt like the entire night. My breasts got tender and sore and I just wanted her off of me. So for those reasons and the fact that we want her to be able to sleep better if not on her own by the time the next babe comes I decided to start the dreadful process of night weaning.
About a month ago I did it for about 2 weeks. Not letting her fall asleep while nursing and doing other things to comfort her. She wasn't taking it well and we went on vacation and I just got fed up with the lack of sleep I was getting. So we took a brake. But we are starting round 2. Its been almost a week and although she still wakes up she only cries for 5 to 10 minutes.
Usually me singing to her is what puts her back to sleep. Its been enjoyable finding other ways to comfort her. She always pushes her body as close as possible to mine, sometimes we hold hands and other times she doesn't want to be touched. I already feel like I am sleeping better. It's just really nice to not have that brake from nursing. The hardest part was saying no to her which I wasn't ready to do until now. Thats how I know Im ready to stop because I can say NO to her. And she is ok. I'm not ready to stop nursing completely I just need it to lessen.
I'm hoping she will eventually start to sleep through the night or just need my touch instead of waking up and crying but we'll see. One step at a time!

"Soaking"

No I don't mean soaking in the bath tub. The soaking I am talking about is soaking in Gods precense. God is so good, so amazing, and so powerful. There are a few encounters in the Bible (moses is one) where God appears but has to be covered by something or hidden behind something because there very sight of Him with our human eyes would kill us. Thats how powerful His precense is. So why not have a taste of that here on earth.

Soaking is something I learned a few years back on my journey to get closer to God. Peter and I both wanted to get to know Him more and experince Him as the real God that He is. Soaking is simply doing what scripture says in Psalm 46;10, "Be still and know that I am God." Thats hard for a lot of us to do these days. Sit down and not watch TV, not read, not talk on phone or do anything but know that God is God. I struggled with it for a while. I ccouldn't settle and just BE. Im the person who has to be doing something while watching TV.

Anyway. What we were taught to do in order to soak and get your mind focused on God is turn some music on. Preferably worship music but some listen to other stuff. At the school of ministry we went to we soaked to christian techno music. That was interesting. You can soak to whatever you want but the idea is for it to get you to focus on God. I like to listen to mellow, worshipful, sometimes words sometimes not, christian music. There are actaul soaking CDs out there which are really great.
Some people like to get focused initially by reading some scripture first or journaling or keeping paper near by so they can jot down there list of things to do and get it off their mind. So thats pretty much all you do. God does the rest. Sometimes you may have a big revelation come in this time of soaking, hear answers to prayers, or have a vision, and other times you just simply feel peace. So much amazing wonderful peace, about anything and everything. Thats my biggest prayer and desire to feel Gods unexplainable peace. So I try and soak once a week but it doesn't always happen. I wish I could do it every day! So give it a try. Turn some music on and spend some time with Daddy God!! Be Blessed!

Here is some artists on my "Soaking" Playlist.
Ruth Fazal

Jason Upton

Alberto and Kimberly Rivera

John Mark McMillan

Lifehouse- just this one song not all there stuff

Guilty

I have been dealing with guilt a lot these days. I feel like such a failure all the time. I feel guilty for: -being too tired to play with Noni -not having energy to exercise -eating too much junk food -not spending enough time with God (praying, seeking Him, reading the word) -not cooking like I used, I hate it anymore -not spending time with Peter and loving Him like I should -not going to church and when I do I don't like it -not being content with my life and my role as SAHM -loosing my temper with Noni way too much -not being able to read an entire book cover to cover -relying on caffiene to get me through the day -for every parenting choice I make because theres a million articles out there saying Im doing at least one thing wrong if not everything Okay I probably could go on if I wanted to but these are just a few. Parenting is hard. Being pregnant is hard and doing the two at the same time is the hardest work I have ever done. I know parenting has made me a better person, I have grown and changed so much but sometimes I feel like the worst person in the world to be doing this job. Should I feel guilty for these things? Maybe but maybe not. I am working through these things and I wish I had some inspirational way of saying its okay and Im all better. But I don't Im a mom and all you moms out there Im sure can relate, this is a season and Im getting through it the best I can. Sometimes failing sometimes succeeding. I am going to accept the fact that I am not perfect.

Etsy

So I did it. I opened an Etsy shop. My very own shop. I have a many many people say that I should do this but kept talking myself out of it. I started sewing just for something to do while Noni naps but then I was sewing stuff and not knowing what to do with it. Why not try and sell it. I would love to sell at craft fairs or something like that but with a little one it would be kind of impossible. Etsy is the perfect way to get started. We'll see how it goes. Im really excited about this but still learning how to use Etsy! Check it out and keep it in mind if you need any kind of shower, birthday, or mothers day gifts.
Keni Laceys Odds N Ends